Poker Face~

Hi, whats up everybody? Is everyone fine? Lol~ Don't mind me, I am just talking to anybody else.

Hahah.. So lame.. I know right?

Hrm.. It came to my attention today, that somebody said that I didn't care.. Or well, I showed no interest of the current biggest issue in my life.. Well not really mine alone, but involves 3 other people in my life..


It hurts.. And it stings..

Because I do care.. I just didn't showed my emotions and air my opinion about it..

Why? Why didn't I, you might ask?

Because that will be disastrous.. I am a walking time bomb full of emotions.. When I do show it, people might get swept away by it.. And everything goes boom.. Die..

Seriously I have my own thoughts and opinions, but in this matter, I really think its really up to the higher ups.. Its their choice.. Its their life.. Me? I will make the best out of it; I will find my own way.. Simple eh?

She asked me, who will I follow if the worse of the worse happens.. And I said, I will find my own way somewhere faraway.. I'll start my own life..

And I really think this is the best.. May be hard, and I know I will suffer.. No more shoppings.. Ahhh The horror!?!?!??!

But yeah, it'll do me good to stand on my own ground.. T_T"

Sucks!

My feelings..

Racism still sucks..

People have been angry, paranoid, misunderstood for such a long long time till they're blinded..

Yes.. They're all blind.. ( those racist people.. I hate them.. )

Lines have been blurred between reality and what used to be..

Now there's hatred everywhere..

Though there are some places that aren't.. ^^

Troubles everywhere..

That's sad..

Malaysians and Malaysians..

Malaysians and Indonesians..

Sheesh people.. Isn't there enough trouble to begin with?

Can't we just get along???

And I wonder.. When and why does this problem starts again in the first place?

I don't know.. I forgot.. It's been too long..

I can't remember...............................

----

Some fellow people called me a traitor, and with other "silly" stuff..

Because I spoke my mind..

I said I hated them for the way they think..

Close-minded and primitive..

And I got all these silly notes..

They called me a stupid kid..

They called me with some more other silly remarks..

Wow..

How nice eh?

Who is primitive and idiot, actually?

Me or them??? ( I won't mention them, but I only say they starts with an M and ends with a Y.. )

Sucks to "them"..

But Bravo to those who managed to break free from the racism cage...

Who managed to live side by side with other people..

Then I began to doubt.. What if I was wrong? 0.O

Hurm..

I Tried...

Time nw : 5.24am

Jeez, i can't sleep.. i tried, but to no avail.. My already too-tired eyes just refused to give in to my needs nw... Simply refused to shut... Ahhhhh.. I hate this... There's soo much.. Too many stuff in my head nw.. I can't sleep, and that only makes me eager, though not meant; to think...

I cant really explain myself. I dun even knw wat i need nw ( tho i thnk its just decent sleep nw.. ) i dun even knw wat i want.. Theres sooo much dat i want but, its a blurred image... i can vaguely see anythng nw... everythng seems to be so far fr my grasp..

Hurm.. thnking bout ths.. im like, shieett... nw my crease line along my forehead wont go away.. hold on, lemme check in d mirror.. * Yeps, definitely staying.. + looong sigh *

Hurm, i cant help but thinkng some part of me is missing... trust me, i really hv no idea wat the other part is, just the fact, i never felt sooo detached frm life.. its like, every part of my self screamed confused nw.. Well, i am confused.. teehee~

hurm.. all i can do nw is sigh.. lots and lots of sighing.. * yea, i sound like old ppl nw.. * sometimes i wonder, why cant just be as easy as it shud be? just as easy as managing computer, or in my case, laptop// Just simply delete files or applictions dat i dun need.. Delete forever memories or thoughts dat i don't want forever, never to be remembered again.. Sigh~

Jeez, i dun even knw why im saying all this stuff.. hahaha~ but anyway, i guess, i'll give it another try ( sleeping.. ) But yea, i will be happy.. hehe.. cant make everyone around me sad eh, just because im going thru some sad-pathetic stage? Lol~~ Lets put on a fake smile and hope everybody goes along with it.. =]