Saturday, April 18, 2009


First and foremost, i am sorry.. To all those people that I've hurt before, and to those I hurt now.. I am sorry.. There are things that we cannot control, and shit just happen, you know.. Therefore, I am sorry.. ( again.. )

Here I am, in my room, with the door locked and my headset tucked steadfastly to my ears with the music roaring loudly ( through the headset.. i don't know how they work, but, Oh well.. ) I kind of enjoyed this feeling.. I am here alone, in my own private space, doing my own things, undisturbed by others.. This is my sanctuary, though things have not been smooth lately.. I don't know why.. Things I've done these few days, they invite only hatred and irritation towards others.. Frankly i have no idea why or what I've done.. But things just seems to be that way.. Nothing seems to be all goody-goody now.. Now it seems that two of my friends are super pissed off with me.. I mean, wow.. And this is all because.. Ouch.. I don't think I'll share it here.. I am such a coward.. ^^ The truth hurts, as well as the excuses made to conceal the truth.. Everything hurts to an extend that you don't even know what to do anymore..

To those two, I am sorry.. I really am.. I know nothing will fix that now.. And no excuses will help anything now, and yeah, no point making excuses because apparently a certain girl is soo tired of me making excuses.. Hurm.. The more I think of it, the more dejected and sad I am.. Okay, I know that I make a lot of excuses but have you look in the mirror yourself? When you get pissed or angry, you affect everybody near you with your super-emotional reaction! I am soo angry with this, but I have not the power to talk about it in front of your face just yet.. Soon, when I can take it no longer....

Sometimes, I wish i can just turn back time and do something to avoid all of this.. Sometimes, I just wish that I am alone.. It's easier.. Don't you think? You don't have to give a shit towards others and all you need to think is yourself and only yourself.. It saves up all the trouble.. Aaaarrgghh!! Life is soo unfair..

Shit.. I guess i just entered my post-traumatic and sulky mode this instant.. It'll be quiet these few days, i guess.. Hurm.. Figures..


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